How do I find my way? What is the reason why? How do I know what is the truth When I see my life pass me by I need to know what’s real I need to know what I should do No one told me. No one showed me I had no choice you helped me through
What I believe isn’t helping me So I have to ask again What is the reason why I’m here What caused my life to be So far away from all I love So many pieces fell apart Still I should thank a god above? who caused this puzzle of a man to wonder why this is the truth If it doesn’t tell me who I am
Nothing is out there watching me No one cares and no one plans No one knows when I’ll be free No one cares or understands It’s up to me and what I do I don’t know, I can’t undo the reasons why this tragedy Made me question my belief It hasn’t helped one day in here I learned to fear I learned grieve
I yearned to learn a different way Take control and never blame My life on any other cause I bent the rules I played the game I never fear these years because I lost these years by my own hand It took twelve years to understand
Go to http://sonniquick.net to hear other music and also my music videos, all located in one place. Your support for my music/book about Jamie’s life in prison is so appreciated. It will help his life inside and also help when he gets out because sale of the book will be his only income at that time. He still has 4 years to go out of 17, but I have been preparing for that for several years.
This is the newest YouTube video with music for my upcoming book, “Inside The Forbidden Outside. The poem runs across the bottom. You can also read it right here.
It is my plan to put out a new video every two weeks, hoping that by the end of the year all of the pieces to my project will be completed and ready for editing. It has taken me three years to get to this point, having no idea what I was doing when I started. What a learning process. It has taken more determination and dedication than I thought I had.
For example – this video took 63 video clips I had to upload to my computer, after I found the ones I wanted, and then upload them into the software program I am using to make the video. Each video took 7-20 minutes to upload to the program. The clips then have to be arranged in the order I wanted and tested and retested. I’m still learning the word editing that has to be inserted into the different frames. It took about 20 hours to make this video. During that time I can’t work on the book or write blog posts. I can’t work on my music websites or keep up social media, so everything moves slowly as I circle through as much as I can in one day.
I don’t take any days off. There are no Monday through Friday workweeks. There is no paycheck for my efforts. When I wake, I get a cup of coffee that gets cold and I begin working. This project – for Jamie – and I don’t kid myself, it is for me, to show what I can do after more than a few years of making music.
If you don’t have deep determination to accomplish something, you may begin, but you won’t finish. You’ll put it aside after you convince yourself you can’t do it. If you can’t motivate yourself, or if you listen to people tell you that you can’t do – you won’t, and you will blame other reasons for why you failed. But blaming yourself probably won’t be one of those reasons.
But to do this I need your help – your support. I have a mailing list for my newsletter ITFO News. But I also now have a mailing list for my music and videos. You can easily subscribe to at at my website: Sonni Quick. When I come out with something new I’ll let you know. Listen and share if you like it. That is the best support you can give me. Subscribe to my YouTube channel. People look at that number when they go to YouTube and determine if someone is worth listening to. Growing those early numbers as quickly as possible is important.
My Name is Jamie – wordpress blog on Jamie’s life and info on prisons and the criminal injustice system
Sonni Quicks Piano Improv – Additional YouTube videos of the music soundtrack for Inside The Forbidden Outside. New videos are released as they are made. When you subscribe and share, other people have the opportunity to learn about the book being written which will help Jamie start a life when he is released. He needs your help. If you have read his story on the blog you understand why. Thank you.
The puzzle pieces of my life are coming together. I find life to be amazing. I don’t think I fully appreciated my life before now. Life slaps us right and left and often knocks us down. It’s up to us to pick ourselves up or complain about how difficult it is and give up. Especially when we’re older. We think it’s too late to begin again and settle for watching other people’s lives on TV. (I threw mine away 25 years ago)
It has taken a lot of work, time and patience. Earlier in my music career there was no “online”. If you weren’t signed, you couldn’t get your music out to the public except through live gigs. I became sick with an undiagnosed disease called Hep C. Eventually It put me down. I developed liver cancer, end stage liver disease, severe osteoporosis which caused bones to break and a few other illnesses.
I came very close to dying. I got a liver transplant and had a few body parts removed in the nick of time. After 2 years bedridden and an even longer climb to as much normalcy as possible I began writing the blog My Name is Jamie for a prison inmate who is also the father of one grandson. I beganto write music again and put it on blog posts. I then began writing a book, “Inside the Forbidden Outside” ( In second draft ) I knew if I wanted to help him when he gets out it would be through this book and music – promoted as a soundtrack to read by. I also started the newsletter ITFO NEWS also can’t survive on a disability check for the rest of my life. Working a regular job would be difficult because of pain from what osteoporis did to my vertibrea.
Music was always my love. For many years I played piano bars, worked in bands and taught piano. Now no one can afford to pay me for lessons in the small Pa town I live in that was close to the transplant hospital. So I made the decision to resurrect my music career and play again. I’ve been recording and working hard to create an online presence. My music is now on several websites
Online stats will make or break a musician today. Becoming a “fan”, leaving comments and sharing will make a big difference on my finding a booking agent. Other people listen to music they see others have liked. Next week I have a photo shoot lined up. I’m not the young woman in the picture anymore. I’m 63. I no longer sing. Too many years of 5 nighters in smokey bars took care of that. But I also no longer do cover material. My ability to create piano improv pictures in your mind surpasses my piano playing of It comes from a deep emotional place. It is who I became instead of playing someone else’s creation.
Today I classify my music as “Stories Without Words” which is the title of an album I am coming out with shortly. When the book is ready, another album will be released with the same cover and promoted together. If I do a good job and if it is promoted right, when Jamie gets out of prison I will have a business put together that will also include lecturing on the negative issues of prison that need to be changed. What he has been through opened my eyes to something I had never given a thought to. He can use his story to help others.
Those who have read my blogs have seen the progress. On many early posts you will many piano pieces – and poetry. ln Over 3 years this went from being just a dream and a desire to help a man who deserves a second chance. We’ve been writing since 2006, helping each other through tough times. As a black man he was put through some awful things no person should have gone through. It is why mass incarceration and the destruction of black lives is so much in the media. It needs to change. We can’t just look the other way and wait for someone else to fix it.
I want my life to count for something. I want to help make this country – and the world – a better place. I don’t want to go out with a whimper. So I push myself – past my doubt and fears. I push myself beyond my physical limitations. I wake up excited every day and start spinning my seven plates in the air to keep them moving forward. I don’t ask myself if I can do it – I just do it.
My music is haunting, peaceful with beautiful melodies. At the end of a stressful day, put on head phones, close your eyes and let it be the soundtrack of your dreams, too. Never give up. Do what makes you happy. Do something different. We all have had dreams of something we wanted to do but perhaps life pulled us in a different direction. We don’t have to settle for that. No matter how old you are or how young you are, life is for living and no one else can live it for you.