The End Game – Poetry

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photo source: hepfi.org

The End Game

Lurking in back of my eyes
Tasting the smells, seeing the ghosts
No matter how often I’ve tried
It reminds me where I’ve been
And how many miles I’ve gone
I tied it up in a garbage bag
And kept on walking alone

Too late, it caught up beside me
And said hi, where have you been?
It’s time to pay the price dear
You can’t run away from sin
You made a cause, the effect is now
There’s no choice, you can’t get away
You chose to play, it’s time to pay
It’s your end game, take a bow

 

by Sonni Quick ©2018

Post liver transplant /cancer survivor/2012

Also follow:  My Name is Jamie. Life in Prison

Am I Too Broken To Mend – Poetry and Music

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Fractures from falling
Invisible pain
Counting the minutes
Like drops in the rain
It runs down my body
Soothing my skin
Gathers the heartbeats
Holding them in

Imagine forever
Time without rest
The passing of memories
My hand on my breast
Feeling my heartbeat
Wanting to end
I’m broken in pieces
Too many to mend?

You get back what you give
No more, nothing less
Trace the wound with your finger
A tiny caress
Time doesn’t linger
Waiting to heal
The pieces of you
That forgot how to heal

 

This is the music and poetry for the latest chapter in my book, “Inside The Forbidden Outside”, an awesome and huge project, which those of you who have followed me already know. Those of you who don’t . . .

I’m in the second draft, although some chapters have been through more than that as I have learned more about the art of writing. Writing blog posts is a completely different ballgame. The first draft was more like a book of blog posts than a creative nonfiction story about a man inn prison as he comes to terms with his life and how he got there. You can read a few chapters from the book at my other blog: My Name is Jamie

You can hear all of the music and music videos completed so far at my website sonniquick.net. Join my mailing list at the top of that page to hear about new music.

This book has a piano soundtrack with song titles that match chapter titles. There are also music videos and poetry. Consequently it has taken 3 years to get this far. This post has the music and poetry. The chapter is half completed and the video hasn’t been stated. When I recorded this piece of improv – all of my music is improv – what came out took the breath out of me. I start with an emotion. The music just comes out in response to that emotion.

Is It Rain Or Tears-Music Video & Poetry

This is the latest music video for the book “Inside The Forbidden Outside,” along with poetry written for it. When it is published in both paperback and Ebook, I want the videos to open in each chapter and give emotion to each chapter. I’m not to sure how to do that or if it is even feasible but it’s worth a shot to find out. My brain works mysterious ways, lol, finding ways to make this more complicated as I write.  I see it in my head. It makes this whole project of writing and music more fun to do. Below are the words found in the video.

IS IT RAIN OR TEARS

Is it rain or is it tears
I felt it on my face
It seldom ceases through the years
Will time be able to erase
the scars created by the pain
I bow my head, the water flows
and cleanses all, a healing rain
The sense of calm a tear bestows

Is it rain or is it tears
I felt them one by one
the wetness soothing untold fears
my dying thirst will be undone
I close my eyes, reach out my hands
scrape my knuckles on the wall
blood mixes with the tears that land
to soothe the pain and heal it all

Is it rain or is it tears
Is it salty when you taste
wetness on your outstretched tongue
slowly falling from your face
The crying tears, the falling rain
mixes on your skin
Cools the heat and soothes the pain
and lets the hope again begin

                                   ©2018  Sonni Quick

 

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photo source: crazy4images.com

 

Twitter  @sonni-quick

Facebook  Jamie Life in Prison    

SonniQuick   Main music website – music and videos. 2nd mailing list for music updates

Watch and Whirl – my other blog – diverse in subject matter

SoundCloud – stream my music. 51 recordings promising to produce great dreams all night while you sleep.

YouTube  my channel is:  Sonni Quick Piano Improve

 

Lonely Spaces – Poetry

TP Starburst sunset CP reservoir 2 28 15LONELY SPACES

I sense in you an open space
looking far across the miles
an ache to fill a lonely place
with just as many heartfelt smiles

When you were young your dreams were crushed
You gathered up the pieces
Fell from your hands when they were touched
The faith you had in love decreases

You tried and lost to find someone
to make you whole again
See past the faces they’re hiding from
Is it real or do they pretend?

Still you search, someday you’ll know
Life isn’t easy until you know for sure
don’t doubt the love you want will grow
In time, the reason you endure

will teach the lesson you had to learn
There’s a reason why you felt such pain
It made no sense, was it just your turn
to feel it over and over again?

Don’t doubt, lose hope, it’s another day
looking far across the miles
When the time is right you’ll find a way
That empty space, it’s filled with smiles.

©2018 Sonni Quick

How Do I Find My Way – poetry

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How do I find my way?
What is the reason why?
How do I know what is the truth
When I see my life pass me by
I need to know what’s real
I need to know what I should do
No one told me. No one showed me
I had no choice you helped me through

What I believe isn’t helping me
So I have to ask again
What is the reason why I’m here
What caused my life to be
So far away from all I love
So many pieces fell apart
Still I should thank a god above?
who caused this puzzle of a man
to wonder why this is the truth
If it doesn’t tell me who I am

Nothing is out there watching me
No one cares and no one plans
No one knows when I’ll be free
No one cares or understands
It’s up to me and what I do
I don’t know, I can’t undo
the reasons why this tragedy
Made me question my belief
It hasn’t helped one day in here
I learned to fear I learned grieve

I yearned to learn a different way
Take control and never blame
My life on any other cause
I bent the rules I played the game
I never fear these years because
I lost these years by my own hand
It took twelve years to understand

© 2018 Sonni Quick

sonniquick.net     My website where you can find my music, music videos, bio and press

Sonni Quick Piano Improv –  my YouTube channel

My facebook page – SonniQuicksPiano

 

 

Ghosts in My Head

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This is new music and poetry for a chapter in the book I’m writing. “Inside The Forbidden Outside,” which has gone through many changes since I began writing. Because it has been so labor intensive I have to believe there is a reason. I have to hope it will help Jamie when be gets out. He has read chapters, but he has heard no music being in prison. There will be so much to hear and read, especially on my other blog, My Name Is Jamie. There will be a video made for this music, too. All chapters will have music – about 50% is recorded, a music video ( 4th one being done) found at Sonni Quick Piano Improv – You Tube channel 

This music is a piece I really enjoyed playing. If I “try” to compose it usually ends up missing something. It doesn’t work. If it hits me in the middle of the night or I have to stop what I’m doing to go play my piano, it comes out and I don’t know where it comes from. Playing these pieces of music, and I can play them only once, feels so good. After that they are gone. I can only listen to the recording of it. The same with any poetry I write and I’m sure other poets understand – I read it for the first time when I’m done. 

In the book, which is written from letters, is Jamie’s story, but there is a place when it changes from the written words in the letters to me being real. I don’t want to say anymore about the story, but it is where this title comes from.

You can subscribe to the mailing list for my music stuff by going to  sonniquick.net

 

Where did you come from?” I cried
You raised your finger to your lips
and whispered, “No one can hear me
No one but you can see me
I’m a ghost in your head
To keep you company

I know the days are much too long
Use memories your mind creates
For days you don’t feel very strong
Endless time, will it ever end?
Around in circles never straight
Time goes slowly, round the bend

Years are passing, you see your age
Watch the moon all night long
I see your head lay in your hands
Wondering how it went so wrong
You always seem to lose so much
You tell yourself, I don’t understand

You need to reach your hand and touch
Feel the warmth of who is there
It makes you human, a worthy man
Even though no one’s left and no one cared
“But you,” you say “Here you stand”
“I could touch you,” and reach out your hand

How do I know you won’t disappear?
You kept me going, when I lost my way
I felt only anger, in my head there was fear
I couldn’t think there’d be hope someday
I wanted to tear these walls apart
I wanted to scream but no one would hear

You kept me sane. You fed me words
There is a reason for all of this
“Be patient,” you said, then I heard
“Imagine a life only you can see
There are ghosts in your head
You can learn to be free”

 

Sonni Quick ©2018